Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong's Head Cantina - After Hours

[dogscoff]

"Just my luck" thinks dogscoff, as he floats about the ethereal realm. "Dead twice in two weeks. I have to say though, the afterlife does look surprisingly like a pub."
He moves toward the bar, and sees another figure there. It's GrowlTigga.
"Hey 'scoff. You took your time."
"Well, DG had a particularly extravagant death lined up for me. He should be along any minute now"

The two pour themselves pints and drink in silence. Before long, a rather confused looking David Gervais arrives, mumbling something about having giant squid being 'unfair'. Taz is next, and takes up his position behind the bar. One by one, the rest of the Cantina's residents float into the heavenly hostelry, ordering drinks and chatting, eating tribble wings and spanging one another across the back of the head with frying pans...

[ March 13, 2003, 13:27: Message edited by: dogscoff ]

[Growltigger]

The strategic defence satellite "Agamemnon" hovers in geosynchronous orbit over the Cantina.

Its highly powered computer brain notices that it hasn't received the signal from the "deadman" chip carried by Growltigga....

Processors signal the strategic battle computer. Thrusters align Agamemnon's missile tubes in the direction of the cantina. Targetting data flows into the guidance units of a couple of 20 megaton "Mean Mother" missiles...

Agamemnon waits for the firing command from the good old President of the USA, George Wubbya, High priest of the Church of Latter Day Morons. He gives the order and the two missiles launch from their bays.....

Countdown, T minus 20 seconds

[Stone Mill]

Originally posted by GT:
To Stone Mill, 25,000 minerals to spend on loose food and greasy women, he also gets Growltigga's leather thong (the one's with the studs on the inside).

While I embody the ghostly form of Elvis, I must advise of the unusual legal chain of events:

Since a dead Elvis can't own property, the items in question goes to the Presley estate. The Heir to the estate is Lisa Marie.

Because of a settlement clause in her divorce papers concerning future "earnings," she is required to distribute said items to her ex-partners:

Nicholas cage now has 25,000 minerals.

And Michael Jackson is now wearing GT's thong.

Growltigger, that will was sensational. I was chuckling all the way to work.

[dogscoff]

So... several hundred Posts after the device started ticking and the health inspectors arrived... the Cantina is finally gone. I guess we should lock down this thread and open up a "ghost cantina" thread while we decide how we're going to get back to the land of the living and where we're going to do our drinking once we get there.

[ March 13, 2003, 14:25: Message edited by: dogscoff ]

[David E. Gervais]

hmmm, this "Ghostly Cantina" is great! Everything is kind of transparent, even (or should I say especially) the clothes the Kylie clones are wearing! mmmmm!

The idea of a "Netherworld Cantina" is great!

Cheers!

P.S. I wouldn't lock down the thread, but perhaps a new name.. "Ye Ghostly Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong's Head Cantina - After Life"


[ March 13, 2003, 14:49: Message edited by: David E. Gervais ]

[Growltigger]

T minus 10 seconds, the two "Mean Mother" missiles lock onto their target and begin their terminal approach.

The wreckage of the cantina is lying quiet, Barry, showing remarkable forethought for a 12 ton lizard with the brain the size of a pea, or Primitive's lunchbox if you like, had retreated to the Tigg-Scoff PLC nuclear bunker and is currently hiding behind a chocolate vending machine 6 miles underground........

[Ragnarok]

*Rags walks around in the new ghostly Cantina wondering what happened. So since he is no officially dead he just recalls all memorys that he had while on the surface. Rags listens to the memory of GTs will once more and realizes that the Red Hot Poker Cannon is in his pocket he grabs it and hoist it in the air. I will use this to the best of my ability GT, I won't fail you now. Rags then turns around and sees GT staring at him laughing his butt off at him. Rags gets embarrassed and brings the RHPC back down to his side and walks to a empty table in the corner of the ghostly room. Rags awaits as the doom of the great Cantina is about to come to an end. It's been fun chaps. Rags states and the countdown reaches 10 seconds.

[Raging Deadstar]

*Raging Deadstar smiles as he gives the ghostly Fbw's the Last order of the day, hopefully having all the attention off the Fbw's will continue in the next cantina. Raging Deadstar smiles evily and decides to point out a legal mistake in GT's will...*

Originally posted by growltigger:
To Abdul and the berber horde, 500,000 minerals so that he can make sure that Rags get's the kicking he deserves for assaulting Abdul with a baguette.

*Raging Deadstar smiles evily knowing full well that it was actually him who assaulted Abdul with the baguette (on more than one occasion)*

"You know rags it seems fair after all, i get attention off the Fbw's and you get accused by one of my crimes, yes life (or death) is quite good, especially as you can't admister a good kicking in 10 seconds, so i suggest we call a truce old boy and let for beautiful revenge on dogscoff in the name of Growltigger the Great"

*Lifts the now ghostly flaming bagguette in the air and points at the ghost of dogscoff, the deceased armies of abdul join them (under orders that they get raganarok, whom they think hit abdul, at the end of dogscoff's demise)*

Shall we?

[ March 13, 2003, 19:10: Message edited by: Raging Deadstar ]

[Ragnarok]

Originally posted by Raging Deadstar:
Shall we?

We shall!
*RD is waiting on the battle front with his army while Rags is in the background collecting his Ping Winged Potato Pixie's and his Giant Battle Gopher army. Once Rags gets everyone in order he grabs the Red Hot Poker Cannon and swings it around his head in good old Knight fashion. Rags jumps onto the lead Giant Battle Gopher and yells: "AWAY WE GO!!!"*

*Rags begins to charge at the unsuspecting Dogscoff and he swings the Red Hot Poker Cannon at Dogscoff only to come to remember that they are in a ghostly state. No harm can be done to each other up here. Rags ponders what to do for a minute and he discusses with RD a little big. Soon both men nod their heads in agreement and Rags runs over to mlmbd and whispers something in his ear. A smile comes across mlmbds face and he nods. mlmbd then hands Rags his "Resurrection for Dumbies - Part 4" book. Rags then begins to look through it and find out how to resurrect different ones.*

*Once Rags figures it out he resurrections Dogscoff back to the Cantina and Dogscoff looks around the room in a hurry wondering what just happened to him. Rags back in the ghostly estate resurrects himself and appears right in front of Dogscoff in the Cantina. Rags goes and looks out the window only to see two missles heading straight for the Cantina. He thinks to himself that he needs to do this quickly. Rags finishes resurrecting the Pixie army and his Gopher battle group back to the Cantina. Rags looks as Dogscoff and says, "You vs. the rest of us. Not much of a chance you got here good ole buddy." Rags smiles evily as he orders the Pink Winged Potato Pixies to attack Dogscoff. They do just so and pretty soon they strip off Dogscoffs clothing. Rags smiles once more as he decided to play his Ace right away. Before he resurrected himself Rags resurrected Richard Simmons. Rags steps out of the way as RS is eagerly awaiting his chance to get his hands on Dogscoff. (Literally)*

*Rags then orders his Gopher army to attack them both and they proceed to tear them to shreds. But Dogscoff is still alive. Rags thinks to himself that this man has some heart. Dogscoff manages to pull himself together. (Once again, literally)
He stands up and Rags just stares at him. Rags then pulls out his Red Hot Poker Cannon and looks down and back up at Dogscoff, he then smiles a very evil smile once more. Rags begins to walk over to Dogscoff, he can see the fear in Dogscoffs eyes. He raises his arm with the RHPC and says: "This is for the great GT!" He then brings his arm down and presses the Red Hot Poker Cannon into Dogscoffs skin. Burning him beyond recongnision(sp).
Rags puts away the RHPC and claps his hands together cleaning off the dust. Dogscoff is laying there barely alive when Rags realizes that the Cantina is about to go. He proceeds to pull out a needle and sticks it into his arm. Rags body collapses and Rags returns to the ghostly realm. Rags figured that this would be better then being blown to bits the way that Dogscoff is about to expierience.*

*Rags walks over the RD and says, "It has been done."

[mottlee]

LOL that hurt!