Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong's Head Cantina - After Hours

[dogscoff]

How about Dogscoff/Loki or whatever the hell he is setting up a new institution, I leave it to him

Very well. Rather than delay the creation of a new thread indefinitely while we bicker about the name, I'll just start a new thread and we can rename it later.

Next poster in this thread: Please destroy the Cantina in a final and spectacular fashion.

Moderators: After the above-mentioned destruction, please lock the thread down and we can allow it to drift away into posterity.

*Crazy-loki-dogscoff performs a lengthy and occult dance, then promptly disappears in a puff of hallucinogenic smoke. He immediately reappears in the grey featureless void between realities...

[ April 16, 2003, 14:28: Message edited by: dogscoff ]

[dogscoff]

* shortly after dogscoff's disappearance, a shining blue portal appears by the bar.

Click here to see where it came from and where it leads to...

[David E. Gervais]

I always like to be among the first, so I follow the portal...

[mottlee]

ROFLMAO!!!! too funny! (you did not see the knifes hidden in its paws??

[mac5732]

Atrocities, no the little blighter was not hurt or harmed in any way or form. I believe he was sentanced to life with a new family who just adores him

just some ideas Mac

[Kamog]

I'm going into the portal, too! Let's see where it goes...

[mac5732]

Mac was sitting under the canapy of the Temp Cantina along with some of the other members enjoying some brewskis and oogling the FBW's when he noticed that the wind had started to pick up, in fact it was starting to get quite breezy, mac noticed the Taz hurridly putting away all the essentials from the bar when Rags went blowing past him in the wind, coming into contact with one of the parked space cruisers in the parking lot, the sound of him hitting didn't sound all that good, RD began laughing at Rags sticking, then ooozing into a puddle at the bottom of the ship, when all of a sudden he to was wisked into the air by the wind and deposited in the large Poo disgard pile on the other side of the parking lot. Mac started to become concerned as the wind continued to get stronger and shrieking like some Banshee brought over from Ireland, Taz yelled at him that he was leaving along with the FBWs as something didn't appear normal with this weather, soon after he left, it started to rain in buckets to the point you couldn't see outside the tent. Mac was by now holding onto his nailed down table and was being lashed by torrents of wind and rain, As he held on as hard as he could, he saw Mottlee, Powerman, Primitive, and David G flying past his location in various strange anatimical positions, Powerman appeared to be trying to turn on his power suit, when.. Bam, he was slammed into the side of Primitive's new cruiser and then they were both gone, the ship and Powerman, lifted up into the atmosphere like twigs from a tree and disappearing into the darkness that had quickly fallen upon the land. Primitive appeared to be trying to grab and hold onto Mottlee's leg, and Mottlee was striking him and yelling some obscene antedotes that were barely recognizable with the howling of the wind, they blew past, crossed the parking lot, over the poo discard pile, still embracing each other in somewhat disgusting behavior with Mottlee either beating or clutching onto Primitive, David G, was laughing as he flew past, singing what sounded like the song from the Wizard of Oz and inbetween lines yelling that he was having the time of his life and then he to was gone up into the upper layers of the atmosphere and gone from site, the bar came loose and flew at poor Mac who ducked just in time and then his table broke loose and Mac found himself in the air about to be sent to who knows where, when he noticed that he was over the large hole of the old cantina, Mac hurriedly let go of the table and at the same time a rope came flying up from the hole which he grabbed after which he was pulled into the large and deep hole. When he got up he found GT, Gryphin, Saxon, Tesco, and Mephisto grinning and singing 99 barrels of beer on the wall, they shoved a brewski into his hands and told him to enjoy the sites, just then, mlmbd flew past screaming in agonizing hysterics and swearing about voodoo hexs and that someone will pay.. then he was gone...., The wind became ever more stronger and soon a loud sound like that of a very large Train was heared quite loudly and appeared to be coming from just east of the temp cantina, the wind became more fierce, howling like something out of the depths of hell, the group carefully looked out and saw that all the ships in the lot were gone, the canapy flew off and the interior contents were flying threw the air like gunshots, HEE laughed GT, there goes Puke, they all looked and sure enough, high over the pkg lot flew Puke, he yelled something at the group, but the wind was to strong and then he to was gone, tumbling head over end into the unknown, then the noise got ever louder, piercing the ears with such a high pitch they covered their ears, hunkered down deeper into the hole, drinking their brewskis and singing 99 barrels of beer. The rain got heavier, hail as large as gonads began hitting them all over their bodies, it was hard to breathe, the oxygen seemed to have been bled from the air.... and El Dogscof came flying and waved while breathing into an oxygen mask and holding something in his other hand Then....... Quiet descended, the noise was gone, the rain let up, it quit hailing, the wind had died to almost nothing. The group climbed up out of the hole and looked around... Desolation stared them in the face, the Temp Cantina was completely gone, it appeared like it had never existed, the huge concrete parking lot was now a muddy river, every ship was gone, trees were knocked down or over, the place was wiped clean of every strand of civilization, Damn, GT muttered, there goes another Cantina, we just can't seem to keep them around for long.... Just then they noticed a pile of muck coming up out of the river of mud in the lot, it came closer until a hand wiped away the crud from its face, It was Geo himself and he was shaking his head, he walked up to GT and said.... Can't you guys ever have a normal bar like everyone else and just sell it when your done with it.... Damn, I've ruined more clothes hanging around these cantinas and then all of a sudden, a huge hole opened under him and he was swallowed from sight, yelling " Not Againnnnnn...... The group just watched, then, with brewski's in their hands started to walk into the sunset... well now, spoke the Gryphin, what do you guys think about rebuilding once more, GT looked at him and said, I hear El Scoffo has a place over in the next county, lets take a look, with that they began walking away into the sunset........

Gone, but not forgotten, from the ashes a rebirth..........

[Taz-in-Space]

...Taz, having seen the new (unnamed) cantina is much better than this one is now, completes the movement of all the bar supplies into the new digs.

So GT wants this place destroyed huh?

After giving the situation some thought, Taz decides to really finish the old cantina for good.

Writing a few quick instructions on an Official ACME order form, Taz sends these instructions back 4 years in time.
Taz then places a time lock on the entire star system to prevent interfering time travelers.

Checking his watch impatiently, Taz waits until a mean looking cruiser enters the system. Said cruiser has ACME printed in large letters on its side. It immediately heads for the sun.

Chuckling evilly, Taz then states that the old cantina's bar is now closed and takes off in a whirling motion through the glowing portal.

What was in the ACME cruiser?
Why does even the mighty Taz not dare to stay?
WHY ARE YOU STANDING HERE READING THIS? RUN!!

(Explainations available in the new cantina thread)

[Gryphin]

:: Steps in quickly, notices the comotion, Accesses the Cantinna computers and accounting grid, Forwards all tabs through the Portal to the systems carefuly in place there, Taz will see them when he powers up the register ;:

[Power Man]

In the desolation a voice is heard, "There's no place like home. There's no place like home … "
With a small Poof a slightly wind blown Power Man appears near the portal.

Boy that was a real Ride !! I am glad I made it. Now were is everyone ??
Were is every thing??

He sees the glowing portal he proceeds to scan it.
So that's were everybody went.

If I am going to "Go were no Power Man has gone before", I need to get some stuff.

He contacts Spork, who has just arrived in the new, improved Dread 2 and beams up to the ship.

A short time later he beams back. He now has a new power suit Mark 2. He is carrying an ACME Carry-All carry all.

As he gets ready to step through the portal he gets a call from Spork. Sporks reports that a mean looking cruiser is nearing the system's star.
In true star ship captain mode Power Man orders Spork, "I will be OK down here. Activate trackers and keep an eye on that cruiser. But KEEP MY SHIP SAFE !!!"

With one final look around Power Man steps into the Portal.