Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave

[primitive]

Primitive walks up to the new arcade game. With his great leather boot, he gives the maschine a viscious kick. This both starts the game and empties it for the credits from the previous players. He easily finds a good rythm, consentrating on the beer, the pizzas and the red peppers. He scores and scores and scores and...

Hmm,
Maybe his kick has broken the game, cause it never stops, and it also seems to get easier after a while when some of the food items run out.

Seeing all that beer flying by , Primitive feels the need to relieve himself. He chooses the new fountain by the new (badly painted) fence. At least he doesn't have to use the sissy facilities indoors anymore.

LOL
Great idea Taz

[Power Man]

Power Man chooses not to run.
He reaches into his Power Suit and pulls out his Long Thick Pink
TOON ERASER (What were you thinking?)

With a few swipes RD's enema shooting device disappears from his hand.
A few more and RD's Hand Disappears !!
A dozen more swipes with the Eraser and Power Man has "Rubbed out" Raging Deadstar !!

All that is left is RD's two big blinking toon type eyes.

These fall on the bar with a coin like "ping".
Taz mistakes the eyes for a tip and grabs them up off the bar and puts them into his "Tip Jar".
(you could say that it look like Taz "has your eyes".)

Power Man looks out and sees a ship coming through the portal.
"OH BOY it is my new PC (Personal Cruiser) I ordered."
He leaves the building and goes out to check his new PC.

On his way he sees primitive heading toward the fountain with "that look".
"Oh Oh this could be interesting."

As primitive gets ready to "use the fountain" he hears the rustlings of many leaves.
The Tigger lilies do not like the idea of anyone spoiling the waters. They begin to turn their sharp toothed flowers toward primitive. Their sharp stickered leaves snap out after primitive's "best bits".

Not only that but those "Coy" fish have turned into "Oriental Fighting" fish and they start leaping up trying to catch any thing "dangling".

Yes, unlike the "poor fountain" in the Old cantina that was for ever getting messed up, this time the fountain has defenders !!

Primitive, not wanting to get his Pee-Pee Pricked, (sorry folks, I could not resist) quickly leaves the fountain area.

Still feeling "un-empted" primitive is happy to spot a "primitive", sweet smelling, "honey bucket" type out house just on the other side of the poorly painted fence. He makes a "Bee" line for the honey bucket and "goes" inside.

PHUE the honey bucket is not so "sweet smelling" anymore.

[Ragnarok]

*Ragnarok walks into the new Cantina and thinks to himself: "Wow, this place is really nice. I'll just set myself up in a new corner over here. Ahh yes, this should do just nicely."*

*RD is sitting in his booth sipping his orange juice waiting for Ragnarok to continue to battle. Rags walks up to RD and says: "Hey RD, I ran into some people with the Universal News Network (UNN) in the parking lot; they said they've heard alot about you and want to take your picture." RD gets really excited at the news and he goes running out to the parking lot where Rags has hired some people to pose as the UNN folks, they proceed to have RD stand on a X in the middle of the parking lot to "take his picture". RD is smiling gleefully waiting for the camara to snap. There is a bright flash and when RD is able to see again he looks down only to notice that there is a huge hole where the X used to be, of course the laws of cartoon physics kick in and he falls the second he realizes what is going on. It is the bottomless pit in which he will not be able to escape.*

Sorry for the delay RD, been a bit hectic, plus haven't had any ideas for taking you out.

*Ragnarok blows his trumpet and yells, "CHARRRRGE!!"

[Katchoo]

*munch*munch*munch*

*BURRRRRP!*

Having finished his meal Katchoo puts his beany propeller hat back on.

"Hmmm...no napkins..." Katchoo muses.

Katchoo reaches over the bar, grabs Taz's apron, and yanks it off.

*Yank!*

Katchoo wipes his faces clean and then heads out the door to use the Honey Bucket. Several days later Katchoo finishes his "business" with the bucket and re-enters the bar. Katchoo tosses Taz's apron back to him.

"There's no toilet paper out there either" Katchoo remarks to Taz before heading for the new gambling room.

Meanwhile the Honey Bucket becomes it's own life form, and as it's first sentient act, commits suicide. A funeral will be held on Friday.

[Taz-in-Space]

...Taz sees the well-used apron on its way and zips over to intercept it with the Toxic-waste Barrel.

With a hiss and a clang, the apron is sealed in the barrel with no time to spare.

After feeding Katchoo the Pepper and Tribble wings Taz knows better than try to clean THAT apron again!

Hmmm, Powerman 'rubbed out' RD? Can't have a good customer default on his TAB that way!

Taking an indelable ink pen from his pocket, Taz draws in an outline shaped vaguely like RD and places the eyes about where they should be.

Taz then waits for the laws of cartoonland to work their magic...

[Raging Deadstar]

"Raging Deadstar looks around, Ragnarok is looking rather guilty and powerman has apparently been rubbed him out! Luckily Raging Deadstar isn't falling forever down a bottomless pit, it turns out that the dust from the eraser blew past Narf and projected raging Deadstars image to ragnarok. So narf is currently falling down a botomless pit, but Raging Deadstar is now a stick man standing in the middle of the cantina (anyone think taz got the idea off the nike advert? ) The stick Version of Raging Deadstar picks up the indelable ink pen and draws on a massive quantum torpedo launcher and a remote control. He then wanders over to david gervais, who after many hours repaints Raging Deadstar back to his former 3d glory, complete with said weapons gleaming from Gervais's superior art work*

*Raging Deadstar pushes the remote control and a giant anvil falls and crushes Powerman, then there is a whirring sound as something like a ship falls out the sky. The sqaushed powerman grows teo large cartoon eyes and feet and waddles over to the door only to see his beloved Dread 2 falling from the sky, reeling from a deadly blow from the Anathema class Battleship. The ship then explodes in a giant fireball of splendour. The squashed powerman just looks on in disbelief. Raging Deadstar then turns round and fires all 6 of his quantum torpedoes at ragnaroks corner, virtually vaporising anything in there except the walls. Ragnarok is then placed in the toxic waste barrel and is sealed before being ejected into space!*

Right *rubs hands* Taz one apple juice please, i believe my revenge has been swift and...vengeful!

[narf poit chez BOOM]

rd is yelling "i got you all" in the middle of the cantina. he seems to have been driven into delusion. after all, the Last time anyone saw narf, he left. and he's still gone till i switch my isp, for the sake of continuity. and to make sure nothing happens to him while i'm gone. so rd's having delusions. he also ate a nut.
[OT] come on, people, don't you want to see the Last person to eat one of the nuts covered in green goop?

[Raging Deadstar]

Originally posted by narf poit chez BOOM:
rd is yelling "i got you all" in the middle of the cantina. he seems to have been driven into delusion. after all, the Last time anyone saw narf, he left. and he's still gone till i switch my isp, for the sake of continuity. and to make sure nothing happens to him while i'm gone. so rd's having delusions. he also ate a nut.
[OT] come on, people, don't you want to see the Last person to eat one of the nuts covered in green goop?

you mean that wasn't you in that armoured suit? but why does he look exactly like you?

*RD wonders to himself who was falling down that bottomless pit then, as it wasn't him, or narf! But it doesn't pray on his conscience long as he returns to his corner and relaxes*

[narf poit chez BOOM]

i ziped out when i thought my isp was going to turn me off. since i don't know when there going to turn if off, i've left myself out. and your still nuts.

[Kamog]

Did someone mention nuts covered in green goop? Where? I'm hungry... food....