The Won-Ton Violence Take-Out Hut - Page 8

douglas · #71 February 17th, 2005, 01:59 PM

"EIGHT..."

"KABOOM"

Suddenly the Take-Out Hut and surrounding forces are cast into shadow as the Post-Dated Check Loan teraports in and fires a warning shot.

"ATTENTION FORCES THREATENING THE TAKE-OUT HUT" blares from the huge ship's speakers, and from several dozen speaker equipped terapedoes that suddenly appear in the midst of General Woundwort's forces. "WE HAVE ENOUGH FIREPOWER TO DESTROY ALL OF YOU MANY TIMES OVER." Minitanks start deploying from the PDCL's bays. "YOU HAVE TEN SECONDS TO LEAVE BEFORE WE OPEN FIRE. ANY ATTEMPT TO ATTACK US OR THE TAKE-OUT HUT WILL END OUR COUNTDOWN EARLY."

"TEN..."
"NINE..."

Edit: An umbrella of terapedoes is launched with orders to destroy any approaching armed craft that can't be positively ID'd as friendly. A teraport denial field is also activated, with a loophole for those who know the key, of course.

Strategia_In_Ultima · #72 February 17th, 2005, 02:02 PM

The COMCA USS Strategia (also known as Sol III) hails the PDCL.

"Captain Tagon. You are in an orbital precision-bombardment target zone. Our precision weapons are fully automatic. Once the firing sequence is in motion, it cannot be stopped without taking half the weapon apart. You are blocking our view of the FCB&G forces, and will also be hit when our weapons fire."

"TEN."
"NINE."

douglas · #73 February 17th, 2005, 02:15 PM

"Sheesh, you didn't really think I'd come without backup, did you?" The Polysyllabic Designation and assorted smaller ships ("smaller" being relative, this category includes the extra Tausennigan Thunderhead Superfortresses that come along) appear, weapons locked on to the USS Strategia's main batteries.

AgentZero · #74 February 17th, 2005, 02:26 PM

The dim light flickers breifly, and Heaven's Holy Legion pops into existence right above Hell's Unholy Legion. Leading the two Legions are, of course, Agent Zero and the Four Horseriders of the Apocalypse. Zero waives his hand in the air dismissively, and a massive demonic dragon appears behind Strategia's COMCA and swallows it with a single gulp. There is a muffled crunch as the dragon's stomach crushes it into tiny pieces, whereupon the dragon unleashes a massive firey belch that reaches across space and neatly blows the Post-Dated Check Loan (and everything in between, including the Polysyllabic Designation and assorted smaller ships) to smithereens.

"Wow," says Agent Zero as he watches a few dozen angels and demons ripping apart the remains of the few forces the PDCL was able to deploy before it's unfortunate demise.
"Cool," says War, before racing off to join the mayhem.
"Ouch," says Pestilence from underneath the smouldering chunk of hull plating that landed on him.
"So," says Death, looking at Agent Zero. "Once again we seem to have gained an overwhelming advantage. Shall we put an end to this upstart Hut once and for all?"
"Not yet," says Zero. "For one thing, we must await Woundwort's order to charge, and for another, the owner of the Hut has yet to take to the field of battle. Until one of those events occur, I'm staying right here."
"Shucks," says Death.

RudyHuxtable · #75 February 17th, 2005, 02:37 PM

Renegade 13: The completion of your mystery word is mAshrELms. Everyone knows that Mashrelms are a breed of Nultoh kitty cat that was responsible for the war between the J'Raenar and the Xiati fifteen minutes ago. Cmon, man I need a real challenge.

Hey everybody:

Thanks for all the help keeping the Hut in tact. Every day we install new security and shielding devices to stop the minimal and uninteresting attacks perpetrated by diabolic nobodies. Rest assured, I'll continue to update the menu with new dishes and stronger drinks as the days pass.

Also, thanks for that spongy chocolatey gooey bomb, evil-doers. That's given me the inspiration for me newest dessert:

The Chocolate Goo Stew
served hot, think of this plucky dish as a cross between a meal AND dessert. You won't need to eat for the rest of the day if you have this delicious treat. First serving is on the house!

Chins up, my intergalactic chums! The Hut has now passed 100,000 served. And hey! Don't forget our new delivery service! Who has a grasp on temporal technology? First person to guess that little poser gets free delivery for a year! That's right! Our time bending delivery boys can deliver your food to you as soon as you hang up your phone!

Bon Appetit!

NullAshton · #76 February 17th, 2005, 02:37 PM

You can't just wipe out all of those with just one dragon! They have gravity shields, as well as armor. the Polysyllabic Designation is probally larger that Sol's moon, and probally has massive amounts of armor and stuff.

NullAshton · #77 February 17th, 2005, 02:42 PM

Xiati have temporal technology...

RudyHuxtable · #78 February 17th, 2005, 02:46 PM

Free delivery for NullAshton! Let's all show your love!

(claps)

NullAshton · #79 February 17th, 2005, 02:50 PM

Woohoo! By the way, do you need more protection? I've got a few B-Destroyer III class dreadnaughts. 6 heavy XII anti-proton beams, great for close air support

Also has 2250 points of phased shields.

douglas · #80 February 17th, 2005, 02:54 PM

Agent Zero's triumph is rather short-lived, as he is forcibly reminded of the incredibly fast reaction time of the AI known as Petey when the entire force teraports back in after a brief absence that lasted just long enough for the blast to dissipate. Several of the terapedoes reappear inside the dragon's stomach and promptly explode before the harsh environment has a chance to damage them. The fragmented pieces of the dragon are quickly reduced to an expanding cloud of monatomic dust when the fleet opens fire with a few of the main guns.