Ye Olde Phong's Head Cantina and Bierkeller - The rebirth

[Growltigger]

Hey hey hey, partying is my business, and business is good!

Erax, the cantina desparately needs a handyman, the job is yours, your interview for the job is to see how "handy" you can be with that Gisella Bundchen clone. I expect plan of attack, order of engagement and a pictorial summary of the result...

OK, cue the oompah band, cue the latin and broadway dancers, cue the jumping monks of jerusalem, cue the morroccan gnou dancers, cue the party,, cue the free booze, cue Mac's colostomy bag, cue the Liz Hurley clones for him, cue the balloons, cue the disco ball, cue cleaning off all those crappy death metal posters RD put up... LETSSSSSSSSS PARRRRTYTTTTYYTYYTTYY

Where is Taz behind the bar when you need him?!

[Gryphin]

Wipes the pizza from my face
Drops it in macs beer
Takes the tribble wing lodged in my muustache and ueses it to prop macs mouth open.
Pours a secrete, "Fire that burs for 50 years sause" donwn his throat.

[Growltigger]

Wahey, this is brilliant. We have had the new Cantina open for all of 30 seconds and Gryphin is already enacting cartoon violence on Mac.

Growltigga pulls out his trusty cricket bat and proceeds to ding RD across the head as hard as possible.... whilst the wretched metalhead is staggering, GT borrows a couple of cymbals from the oompah band and whams them across RD's kopf too BOINNNNGGGGGGGGGG

See Mac in the corner, GT pulls out his trusty red hot poker handcannon (ooh I missed that) and proceeds to shoots a bolt up the old chap's backside... sizzle sizzle sizzle.....

Yipeee BAARRRRR FIGGGGHHHHTTTTTT

The kitchen doors open and a horde of diminutive cowboys come charging out to join into the fray

[Rollo]

Yaaayy! Barfight!

*Rollo storms towards the kitchen door and swings his mighty axe in an 360° arc, bisecting all of the tiny cowboys. Then he continues to chop them into tiny pieces.

Hey, Taz! I guess you can put stew on the menu for tomorrow.

[Growltigger]

Ooohhh dont be too nasty to the cowboys Rollo, you should use non-lethal forms of fighting first. Swinging a battle axe is a little final (if typical Germanic)...

Cant you just thump them a bit first?

[Rollo]

alright...

*Rollo pulls out The Shovel of Cowboy Thwacking and beats the cowboys into pulp...

...wait, that's not right either, is it? (sigh)

my apologies...

*Rollo hides his axe and shovel behind his back and uses puppy eyes: I didn't do it...

[Gryphin]

I wonder where those cowboy bits will turn up next. Think I'll stick to plain pizza