[OT} What *not* to say at Lord of the Rings

[dogscoff]

61 - Repeatedly point out how much Elvish sounds like Welsh.
62 - Prove point 61 by loudly dubbing the entire in film into Welsh.
63 - Repeatedly point out how much 'Elvish' sounds like 'Elvis'. Accompany your observations with hilarious "Elvish Elvis" renditions.
64 - Come to the cinema dressed in a 50 foot high, suplhur-belching Balrog costume and sit in the front row.
65 - Explain to everyone that if this were nethack, Gandalph could easily wipe out that orc army with nothing more than a wand of polymorph, some blank bits of paper and a magic marker.
66 - Discuss in depth the resemblance between the Eye of Sauron and a certain part of the female anatomy, and the Freudian socio-psychological implications that it casts upon the makers of the film.

[ December 23, 2003, 10:15: Message edited by: dogscoff ]

[Rollo]

67 - As Leggy finishes his stunt with the mumak (known as the 'Orliphaunt', btw) exclaim: "Yabba Dabba Doo!"
68 - Towards the end of the movie yell: "Die already! I gotta pee!"
69 - Everytime the tower of Barad Dur is shown, say: "Look, it's Geoschmo!

[ December 23, 2003, 10:46: Message edited by: Rollo ]

[General Woundwort]

70 - During the spider attack on Frodo, say "Man, he should have used Deep Woods Off..."

And the piece de resistance...

71 - Get two friends. Two of you should dress as robots, the third in a blue jumpsuit. Sit in the very front row of the theater, and say all the lines in this thread VERY LOUD at the appropriate moments. And every once in awhile say, "Hey Dr. Forrester, when's the commerical break?!?"

[Loser]

72. Warn your friends that you will talk during the previews, but fail to warn them that you have issues with large spiders jumping out of dark places.

True story, went to the movie with a crowd of friends. Chick friend sat next to me and totally freaked out at the Shelob scene. I had no idea, no warning that she was going to scream.... Goddamn adrenaline kicked in like cold coffee with ephedrine for creamer and I was high for the next twenty minutes.

I think her boyfriend/fiancée/husband (not actually sure of the status of that) was trying to calm her down, but she screamed again when Frodo got the hypo-loving.

On the plus side, for the rest of the movie I got full claim to the armrest on the other side, as some stranger decided he didn't want to sit on our row after all.

[Ed Kolis]

Originally posted by dogscoff:
66 - Discuss in depth the resemblance between the Eye of Sauron and a certain part of the female anatomy, and the Freudian socio-psychological implications that it casts upon the makers of the film.

I know... one time I went to Gamespy and I saw the Eye pop out at me (it was an ad for a LotR game) and at first I thought! GAAA PORN ADS ON GAMESPY!!! Now I'll REALLY get in trouble for surfing the internet at work! Then I realized it was just the Eye... actually it might have been the Ring at an angle, I'm not sure, it flashed by so fast...

[geoschmo]

73. Loudly engage your freinds in a game of "Six degrees..." all during the movie.

Elrond! Played by Hugo Weaving, who stared as Agent Smith in the Matrix, opposite Carrie-Anne Moss, who played in Red Planet with Val Kilmer, who starred in Top Gun with Tim Robbins aka 'Lt. Merlin', who appeared in Bull Durham with Kevin Costner, who starred in JFK as Jim Garrison, opposite the character Willie O'Keefe played by Kevin Bacon!

Gimli! Played by John Rhys-Davies, who appeared in Raiders of the Lost Ark with Harrison Ford, who played in Working Girl with Sigourney Weaver, who starred in Ghostbusters with Dan Akroyd, who played in Dragnet with Christopher Plummer, who starred in A Beautiful Mind with Ed Harris, who also appeared in Appolo 13, with Kevin Bacon!

[ December 23, 2003, 13:52: Message edited by: geoschmo ]

[Gryphin]

/Makes note to self what cites not to see LOYR in.