Advise

Taera · #1 July 18th, 2003, 07:11 PM

this had become a joke thread now? either way, i enjoyed the jokes people, thanks for the morning's laugh

Wardad · #2 July 18th, 2003, 09:43 PM

Well, this thread is supposed to be about relationships and living. So I throw in those type of jokes.

Taera · #3 July 18th, 2003, 09:50 PM

ok sorry, but the jokes are realy good

Kamog · #4 July 20th, 2003, 04:19 AM

Quote:

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

She will probably tell you that she does, in fact, need it.

Quote:

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

He starts worrying a little bit before that.

Quote:

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

Corollary: there are very few, if any, successful men.

Quote:

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

Therefore, there are very few successful women.

Quote:

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

When they ask you, "Are you still single?" respond by saying, "Yes, are you still married?"

Wardad · #5 July 20th, 2003, 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kamog:

quote:
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

When they ask you, "Are you still single?" respond by saying, "Yes, are you still married?"

LOL!

Loser · #6 July 21st, 2003, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Wardad:
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

"Are you still single?"

"Yes. In this state, anyway."

Wardad · #7 July 30th, 2003, 01:41 AM

A WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST:

She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.

Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.

Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.

And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

WOMEN'S REVENGE

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. "No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN

I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.

And Finally

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he Deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife? He answers, "You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's sooooooooooo much cheaper. So..... I figure if I have to roll my own so does she.