The Won-Ton Violence Take-Out Hut

[Strategia_In_Ultima]

StrategiaInUltima said:
...NEWS FLASH

A large group of very rare Xiati/Cue-Cappa crossbreeds, of which none were supposed to exist after the Genological Riots, have complained about a disturbed psychotemporal quantum field near the Won-Ton Violence Take-Out Hut. Upon inspection, officials concluded that the restaurant had been replaced with a quantumchroniton illusion that functioned as the gateway between the material world and a pocket universe. Councillor Hackett, the councilman that ordered the investigation, demanded it be removed immediately, and the original Hut put back in its place.

When asked, Hackett stated that this occurence had nothing to do with his new Intragalactic Inc. TX-23 interplanetary sports car, or with the firebombing - which happened sometime later.

Growltigger Enterprises has generously offered to place tight security near the restaurant, if it ceded corporate control to GT Enterprises. When the hut proprietor, a mr. Huxtable, refused, another firebombing consumed the entire alcohol storage building next door, where the main ingredients for most of the establishment's drinks were kept.

GT Enterprises has refused to comment on this occurence.

The dimensional gate was Jack's, not mine. I just showed a recent news flash to the patrons in which a councilman had ordered the annihilation of the pocket universe and that had already happened, according to the news flash.

You see, Jack? Your pocket universe had already been demolished.
I'm sorry for you.

And AZ... I know the Hut is gone, too. I stated that the first shot from a quartairy PDC annihilated just about the entire fricking northern hemisphere.

[NullAshton]

Good thing I don't eat or drink anything at the hut yet... Also a good think scans are done on all food leaving or entering my bases. Now excuse me, as I go play a mod with worldships...

[Strategia_In_Ultima]

A 250MT Peacekeeper Command Carrier and its escort ships, all three of them similar 250MT COMCAs, glide slowly through interstellar space. Severely damaged from a battle with eight Scarran Dreadnoughts, they are now easy prey for any passing raider.

Today, however, it is not a group of raiders that the ships need to watch out for.

It's a fleet of five standard 25MT COMCAs packed to the brim with boarding marines.

The fleet slowly but surely closes the gap between them and the damaged PK COMCAs. The lead NH COMCA sends a message to the others.

"Attack."

The ships suddenly display an immense burst of speed and hyperjump a few kilometres right into the middle of the PK flotilla. The first few seconds of battle are the fiercest. The PK COMCAs try to keep the NH COMCAs at bay by frantically firing whatever weapons they have left and by pushing the engines far beyond their current safeties. Then the first NH COMCA locks on with a PK COMCA. Boarding marines stream out of a massive amount of freshly-drilled holes in the PK COMCA's hull. The fighting is fierce. Batch after batch of fierce marines charges headfirst into batch after batch of Peacekeeper soldiers. The PK troops start to lose the battle after having lost more than half of their soldiers. The battle is then quickly decided, as on the other ships. The newly aqcuired 250MT COMCAs are being towed away to a secret NH fleet facility.

A new DCOMCA will soon be ready.

[NullAshton]

I really want one of those worldships...

[Strategia_In_Ultima]

I really want to add DCOMCAs to Capship to help get the Strategia IV through the Deus Ex Machina field surrounding the FCB&G, to deliver a massively strong precision strike at it and annihilate it completely once and for all. And there ain't no Angel of Death that can stop me!

[NullAshton]

8 Null-Destroyer class battlemoons decloak in orbit around the earth with gravity dampners to prevent tidal effects, and are now guarding the hut. 21,000 phased shields, cloaking systems, gravitic sensors, ECM systems, combat sensors, multiplex tracking, a thousand shield points regenerated a combat turn, 5352 armor points, a repair bay, 186600 supply points, and 20 point defense lasers. Its main weapon is a null-space projector on a core mount, doing over 4K of damage, bypassing all armor and shields except leaky armor. 10 massive wave-motion guns are mounted on the battlemoon, each doing 700 damage. 8 massive anti-proton beams are mounted, each doing 175-300 damage. BuckyTube Gel plating is installed on the ship, 1750 kilotons.

[Growltigger]

A silence descends across the Won-Ton Violence Take-Out Hut.. a tumbleweed skitters across the bar room floor on its lonesome journey, all is quiet, all round the house, nothing is stirring, not even that bloody mouse Narf...

A rather overmuscled, heavily befang-ed nasty looking (but yet debonair and handsome) tiger pushes open the door, blissingly shortcircuiting all the ineffective forcefields and dampening fields in the hut..

He stubs out the rather large havana he has been smoking (naturally, on the nearest member of staff) and cradles the steaming one-and-only red hot poker hand cannon in his armpit. He scratches his derriere blissfully and has a look round the wrecked hut.

"Ladies, please. As you recall, PROPER cartoon violence is conducted mano et mano, eye to eye, backside to backside, legion of byzantine killer mongooses to army of ninja killer micro-shrimp, and preferably with large hand weapons and an awful lot of attitude and extreme prejudice.

What we do not do is attack each other with large fleets of spaceships in what effectively is a boasting contest a la my todger is bigger than yours. Surely it is all about a healthy mix of linguistic creativity, imagination, elan and savoir faire with a measure of sexual tension to boot....

I am here to announce that Tigg-Scoff PLC WILL NOT be considering any takeover offer for the Won Ton Hut. We will instead be reinvesting capital in the cantina, with all new look FBW's (it stands for Fluffy Bunny Waitresses by the way), theme nights, theme fights, tribble wings and a variety of amusing and interesting anecdotes for your delectation and delight. Crikey, we have even persuaded Mac to bathe for the occassion...

I trust you will be all able to join us for a cheeky half or two..

PS of course, not making a take over bid does not mean that gratuitous violence may not occur!!

[tesco samoa]

You guys/gals need some coffee cups

http://cgi.ebay.ca/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?...e=STRK:MEWA:IT

[NullAshton]

This is for protection of the hut. And to vaporize anyone I don't like...

[Jack Simth]

(I was wrong? Oh well. In that case....)

Jack again rises up from the ashes of his own distruction, and this time Death doesn't even bother to make an appearence. He quietly rebuilds his body, and then surverys the wreckage of his creation.

"They broke my universe. They broke my universe. NO. I LIKED MY UNIVERSE. I suppose I'll just have to break theirs. Fortunately, I've got a few allies I can call a favor in from...."

Jack starts to form a Gate so he can call on his allies, but then stops immediately before the seal can get him. He blinks for a moment in confusion, and then a slow, evil grin spreads across his face as he analyzes what he saw in that brief glimpse of the shield.

"Well, looks like I won't need to call in that favor after all."

Jack immediately sets to work, building a small golem, who's only purpose in life is to fix such planar seals, then makes it independant and watches it work. It immediately tries to link itself up to the seal around the plane in order to reinforce and repair it. Unfortunately (for the golem), the trap in the seal takes effect, and erases the golem from the timestream. Unfortunately (for the seal) the golem was connected to it at the time, and so the trap continues on, removing the seal from the timestream. Unfortunately (for the local universe) the seal was tied in to the plane's very existance, and so the trap continues through strats to unravel the entire plane of existance.

Meanwhile, Jack produces a small demiplane about five miles in radius, and puts a temporary gateway between the crumbling universe and his own, stable universe.

"Anyone who wants off the sinking ship better hurry!"

With that, Jack heads off into the plane of his own creation, and starts rebuilding the Hut.